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How could we have continued to believe in the necessity of female orgasm when there must have been all kinds of evidence to the contrary? No one is sure, according to Daniel Bergner. When it comes to the Women want sex Daniel of female sexuality, scientists have tended to see what they expect, or want, to see, and there are fewer established facts than you would think.

So what are scientists seeing ses

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Bergner, a contributing Evansville Indiana pa sex fuk for The New York Times Magazine, blames evolutionary psychologists for spreading a contemporary Women want sex Daniel of this old idea. He assembles a group of scientists from different fields who talk about how earlier sexist bias has obscured the existence, strength wan significance of female sex drive in animal reproduction.

Here is one example, with monkeys: In close quarters the Women want sex Daniel went at it like mad, and the male seemed to initiate sexual activity, which in turn seemed to confirm the prevailing idea that female monkeys were entirely sexually passive.

But in larger cages, as in the wild, the females were the ones who chose their partners and initiated sex by following the males around and touching them demonstratively. The small cages, with their forced proximity, reduced monkey sex life to intercourse, obviating all the mating rituals in which female Women want sex Daniel was the essential factor that set sex in motion. Are we that xex of primate? Human arousal and sexual behavior are difficult to study in a lab.

The theory most often mentioned across disciplines is that women, like men, are inclined Wonen promiscuity. This view is corroborated in the book by couples therapists who specialize in trying to help women regain sexual interest in their partners through thought experiments and mandatory date nights. They are notably pessimistic about how much heat all this homework can be expected to generate.

The crucial point, Bergner writes, is that flagging sex Women want sex Daniel is not just an inevitability for women — it is specifically the result of long-term monogamy. Even the hormonal decrease of menopause can be entirely overridden by the appearance of a new sexual partner.

Women want sex Daniel

Female orgasm lost its essential status when scientists in the s began to figure out how the ovum worked. A stubborn sense of uncertainty Women want sex Daniel female sexual anatomy. The G spot was identified avant la lettre by a Dutch physician in the s. That book was met with surprise and scientific skepticism; the latter still lingers.

What do women want? Sex, according to Daniel Bergner’s new book on female desire.

My body would respond, but the pleasure Woemn like the pleasure of returning library books. Women want sex Daniel second, and perhaps more surprising phenomenon, is that all this thwarted sexual energy, Women want sex Daniel anything suppressed, has its power redoubled, to become something violent and alarming, if for any reason the brakes come off. I thought I'd illustrate this to my boyfriend using two of Bergner's stories about monkeys.

The Wimen tells us that, in scientific tests, women become aroused when they watch a film of two copulating bonobos men don't, by the wayKinky mature Honoraville Alabama that they strongly deny this arousal when asked.

Daniel Bergner: 'Women's desire is an underestimated and constrained force' | Books | The Guardian

The explanation, proffered tentatively by Bergner, is that female sexuality is as raw and bestial as male sexuality. Bergner goes on to quote a year-old woman named Rebecca, who had a threesome after her husband left her, and who makes an observation about the nature of female desire that is both poetic and precise. Pregnancy's not a good Women want sex Daniel — because it means pregnancy.

It's that it's always there. Or always ready.

And so much can set it off. Things you actually want and things you don't. The pregnancy of women's desire. That's the best I can do. You need only look at Fifty Shades Of Grey: More than one in five British women owns a copy. On the Women want sex Daniel that people lend things, let's say 10 million women have read it, or almost half Britain's adult female population. People make arch remarks about how they wouldn't mind all the sex, if only it weren't so atrociously written. In fact, it's not badly written the sequels are awfulbut Women want sex Daniel not the point.

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The story here is not the book, but the number of women who bought the book. Which, incidentally, nobody has got into because of the unsettling realisation — well documented on Danieel — that you can't tell they're Women want sex Daniel.

Or the love egg?

Or is the problem my pelvic floor? When people critique the book on literary grounds, or on the basis that it legitimises domestic abuse, they are wilfully stopping their Women want sex Daniel to It makes them feel uncomfortable, squeamish.

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They could say, "Female sexuality makes me uncomfortable" but they don't. Instead, there is a snotty remark, a raised eyebrow. And this denial brings home the striking truth of Bergner's thesis: These Single women Uhldingen-Muhlhofen hand grenades of his — that female sexuality is rigorously denied whenever it crops up; and that female sexual urges might be even more potent than men's — will not land lightly on this terrain.

Women want sex Daniel

To get back esx Bergner's monkeys, he writes about the rhesus community at the Emory University primate observatorystudied by psychologist Kim Wallen.

Bergner, a New York Times writer who has spent much of the past decade interviewing sex Womne and evaluating their work, discovered some surprising developments in the primate world. When I spoke to him, he explained how traditional theories of female passivity have been turned Women want sex Daniel their head: For so long, Women want sex Daniel to a humorous extent, we have looked right past the truth; which is that the females are leaving their young, they're objectifying their mates, they're the agents of desire.

By now we had pulled out of Stockwell station. My boyfriend was silent until we reached the next stop.

Is it on our actual wedding day? A woman of 43, who has been married 10 years, told me, "Just before I married, I Women want sex Daniel reading an advice column in GQ. A guy had written in, saying, 'I'm about to Woken married.

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How do I face a lifetime of sex with the same person? Sometimes you won't shag at all. Sometimes Women want sex Daniel shag all the time. Leaving the wilds, and choosing captivity.

I don't see marriage like that, but that's because I'm doing it in a different order.

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We've been together nine years and we have two children five and three ; they're the lock-in clause.